Saturday, August 12, 2006
styles of blogocombat: men vs. women
I hate patriarchy, i.e., the male domination, non-appreciation, and strident exploitation of women. Even in our enlightened age, where women can vote, get educated, and serve as professionals -- we men remain rather caveman-ish and uncouth in many ways.
I think I'm guilty of some macho brutishness sometimes. Especially in blogocombat, my term for online debate. I fight so hard for what I believe to be right, or best practices, that I inadvertently might hurt someone, or seem to attacking them as persons.
Only when I'm convinced a person is a con artist, trouble-maker, or criminal--that's when I attack their person, as well as their behavior or beliefs.
Women tend to be nurturing and conciliatory, seeking to reconcile and make amends. Much of this may be genetics (modern term for "spirits" or "unknown forces").
But I'm afraid that much of this pacifying is due to the cruel treatment of women, a sadism that is expressed in treating females as "dangerous property": wrapping ladies in burkhas (Islamo-fascism), forbidding women to be pastors, priestesses, and CEOS (America), and binding their feet (China) so they become helpless and less able to flee.
I see men as more combative, violent, insensitive.
Us guys seem to enjoy a good fight, whether it's a televised boxing match, a war, or a struggle to be the "top of mind" choice for the consumer. Often, us guys become best friends with another guy...AFTER we have beat the crap out of each other.
Girls and ladies just don't understand that.
Here's what Liz Strauss posted in reply to my wondering about her technique of blog community building. This was a comment she recently posted in response to my comment at her Successful Blog site, which I highly recommend.
Liz has succeeded in making her blog a warm and welcome oasis of friendly discussion. She is so sophisticated, she allows comment posters to go OT (off topic), to talk about unrelated topics, within a post thread. That is very unusual. To Liz, a comment can be whatever is sparked in the reader's mind by her post. What a terrific attitude!
Author: ME Strauss
Here's my secret. I really like talking with the people who come here about the ideas that they leave in the comment box.
I also truly believe most people know more than they believe they do -- that's my experience as a teacher coming out.
In real life, I'm more of a tough love teacher than a nurturer, but I don't like conversations that raise the atmospheric stress because they change the tenor of an "argument." Personally when debate gets too heated, I can't hear anymore. I get like a deer in the headlights from the information.
I also notice that in the heat of the battle that men often twist the argument premise slightly to get back on a winning track.
I will have much more to say about all this in the coming days. I am contemplating Why We Fight Online as a serious and vital topic for all who blog.
The main reason I fight online is because there seems to be a firmly entrenched Kingdom of Mediocrity & Deception that is very hateful to anyone who attempts to unveil and expose it. So that motivates me to develop sophisticated blogocombat weaponry and strategies.
What do you think about online debate? Do you avoid it? Are you uncomfortable with conflict? Confrontation? Intervention?
What say you?
Posted by steven edward streight at 8/12/2006 11:06:00 AM