Saturday, April 08, 2006

from trivia blog to ecommerce site: Part 1

You can begin now to transform your personal trivia or professional boredoms blog into a money-making ecommerce site. Each step you take, brings you closer to your goal of wealth.

Here are some helfpful hints and obscure suggestology nuggets for your impatient, hurried, distracted consideration.


From Trivia Blog
to
Ecommerce Site

(the first 4 steps):


(1) Lurkers Rule!

Forget popularity and number of comments received on your blog. Comment posters are know it alls, like me, and not shoppers, consumers, or customers.

Practical Application = So a successful ecommerce blog will please the steady, loyal lurkers, and not worry much about negative comments or flames from jealous trollers.

(2) Create or Obtain the Downloadable Product.

Maybe your product is your sense of humor manifested in clever blog posts. Your ecommerce product might be a book of your funniest, most outrageous posts. You might revise some posts, or add to them, and turn that blog's highlights into a new and different print or PDF product.

Maybe you combine web usability and Dada sensibilities. That's a product: a surreal look at the blogosphere, from a geeky, IT oriented, deconstructionist, avant-garde viewpoint.

Or perhaps you create digital art, or sock puppets, or software. Are you good at giving advice to your friends? Do your peers tend to trust you and buy the products you recommend? Then write book, product, and service reviews, critiques and accolades, in your blog, you dope!

Let the world see how clever and reliable your product recommendations are. Share your genius idiocies with a global audience, the anonymous web browsing public! Maybe a company will hire you as a corporate spokesperson blogger.

Figure out a way to enable people to buy, order, download, or at least inquire about your product or service--right there, at your blog or web site.

Blogs that just chatter at people are dead.

Readers expect to do more than just read our monotonous, self-congratulatory, mundane, pseudo-insightful blabberings. Blog visitors demand practical, tangible, auditory, or visual objects of astonishment.

Chartreuse, for example, is displaying vlog selections, video blogs and music video excerpts, using YouTube.

Since the blogosphere is doomed, we must hurry up and figure out a way to make our mark on history, sell some cool stuff, and build a good reputation...while we still can.

Practical Application: Go determine your best blog posts, print them out, assemble them in some order, staple the mess together, then read the abyssmal garbage.

If you can read your own horrible verbose vomit more than 5 times, without boring your ass off, and one other person, not including your mother, thinks it's interesting or funny...y'our book has begun!

(3) Ramp Up the Violence!

Get more angry, express more irritation, be more controversial. Be intellectually aggressive, bite off more than you can chew, and spit out the seeds of dismay.

Be more edgy, off the hook, loose cannony. Think and Dream and BE Outside the Box.

Challenge your bad self to be worse. "Winning Through Worst Practices", the sub-title of Cluetrain Christopher Locke's astonishing book Gonzo Marketing, means exactly that. Do what everyone else is afraid, or too dumb, or too unimaginative, to do.

Make the "impossible" seem easy and natural...for you.

Practical Application: Go write something that burns the page, a fiery sermon, an impassioned plea, a fanatic rave about something you like, whether a movie, music band, book, teacher, parent, child, philosophical idea, spiritual practice, science fiction story, girlfriend, whatever.

(4) Do Something...Try Anything...But Do It NOW!

Practical Application: The exact moment you finish reading this post, I want you to go to Lulu or some other POD (print on demand) online publisher, and see what can now be done with Downloadable Products.

a\\nd, when it comes to product, let's be sure to include books, videos, software, music, and art.

2 comments:

chartreuse said...

I only show videos because I am lazy. Really.

steven edward streight said...

and funny, too. actually.