Thursday, September 15, 2005
you are all in training
you are all in training
is the theme of this little note.
Everything I post at Vaspers the Grate is designed to secretly train a core group of bloggers, both personal and business, to invasively transmute the Blogosphere 3.0 to Blogosphere 5.0, skipping 4.0.
I am trying to forge a wedge that is rammed into the weak spot of the bloatosphere: that bloated realm of pseudo, ghosted, simulacra, faux, quasi, and anti blogs that reduces the overall value of the blogosphere.
My team, and if you're reading this, you're in the team, whether you knew it or not, is composed of free thinking rebels, cautious experimenters, and wild innovators.
Soon, I will publish a post on who I think are the best bloggers in the categories of Unique Voice, Relevant Link King/Queen, Most Imaginative, Most Artistic, Most Insane, Most Professional, Most Credible, Most Controversial, Most Radical, etc.
I want a certain contingent of bloggers to be able to see with my X ray vision.
I'd like to think a few Super Bloggers were emerging, guided at least partially by my better moments here at Vaspers the Grate.
As you read my posts, you slowly begin to be filled with Truth, which results gradually in Trust.
Blogging Blogopathic Blogophobes
There is a type of person who reads blogs, posts comments on blogs, and maybe has a blog, but more probably runs a web site, so feels superior to mere lowly bloggers.
"Blog": ugh. What an ugly lowly name. Too ugly to ever be arrogant. "I'm a blogger." Try saying that at the next cocktail party, cook out, or coffee bar conversation.
"Blog": grrr. Blogs make people angry. They attack you with subtle or blatant blows. Pretty vacant. Out to lunch, they argue that anything bloggy beyond the blog itself is ridiculous.
Did you catch that last statement? A whole world of understanding lies hidden and naked within it.
Everything bloggy beyond the blog itself: lower than lowly.
Blogocombat fighters and commenters: meet yet another enemy--wolf in dove's clothing. An anti-blogging blogger/commenter.
High Comedy: Of course it's especially funny to see them use blogs and blog comment functions to complain about, mock, dismiss, or attack blogs and bloggers.
They especially hate the term "blogologist", which is why I choose to call myself that. And "blog consultant" is extremely repulsive to them, I guess based on phony, inept people who pretend to have something valuable to say about implementing a blog in specific client applications.
According to these blogopathic blogophobes, these
Are Not Necessary:
* Blog Day
* Blog Consultants
* Meta-blogging (blogs about blogs)
* Special Blog Vocabulary (permalink, trackback, RSS, captcha, cold kicking, comment spam, wildcatting, clinking, proxy blog, podblog, glog, phlog, clog, unblog, bloggy, bloggery, blogmatic, blogoid, bloog, vlog, O-blog, Super Blogger, blogopoly, blogtivist, blogistics, blogology, blogologist, blogosphere--the more blog words are invented, the more angry they get).
* Mention of "blog" in any situation, especially a favorable report.
* Discussion of your blog and what you like about blogging.
* Explanation of why you blog and what your latest post deals with.
* Basically, anything that doesn't praise the blogophobe's conventional static web site and superior intelligence for sticking with an outmoded unilateral communication vehicle.
The background story that spawned this manifesto.
You Are All in Training
[signed] Steven Streight aka Vaspers the Grate
Posted by steven edward streight at 9/15/2005 10:28:00 AM